Spent more time in the studio this afternoon. Then played around with one of my favorite human beings (who happens to live 600 miles away and I don't get to see nearly enough) on the computer. We were posting favorite songs to each other seeking solidarity, acceptance, and a little intimacy that only comes from sharing one's music taste. I was in a great place.
Then the fucking world began to unravel. I finally (FINALLY!!) got the definite answer from the boss of the job I'd interviewed for (the dream job that would provide the escape from my hell job).
The answer? They'd decided to , and I quote, " recommend another candidate".
crushed.devastated.angry.sad.frustrated.impotent.distressed.shocked.disappointed.disillusioned.
I simultaneously grieved for the job I'd envisioned and for the life change I thought would occur AND for the hell that I would return to when summer vacation ended. In the blink of an eye my chance was gone. My opportunity yanked out from under me. I went from a great high to a great low in a matter of seconds.
I'd wasted so much time time thinking and planning for this job! I don't understand! I cannot comprehend! I had done so great in the interview! I'd bagged it! What the hell does this other person have that I don't??!
I haven't cried that hard or for that long in years. If you want exact measurements, I sobbed for 2 hours.
so...my beau is beside himself on how to handle this situation. How to save a person who is drowning in sorrow is a monumental task.
His solution?
Get her drunk and get her drunk fast.
Get her drunk and get her drunk fast.
So, I donned my biggest pair of sunglasses to hide my ridiculously swollen eyes, and off we went for an infamous drink called "the Painkiller".
Boy, did I have some pain to kill.
Dreadful Day
