the tomato sandwich

Making a sandwich from tomatoes is delicate matter.

The first rule is that the tomatoes MUST, and I emphasize the word MUST,  be homegrown.
Not necessarily from your home, but not a grocer's tomato.  GROCERY STORE tomatoes are lifeless, tasteless and white on the inside.  You may as well just make a sandwich of lettuce.

Disclaimer:   Again, if all you have is a store bought tomato, just forget it.  There is no use is going any further.  
Only disappointment and failure await you.  I accept no responsibility for your unsuccessful sandwich.

From this point forward I will refer to the tomatoes as toms.

Step #1  

Lightly toast your bread of choice.

Untoasted bread can't participate.  The tom is too juicy and the bread ends up falling apart.

I prefer whole wheat.

The lighter breads are too sweet.  Homegrown toms are at their very nature sweet, so the whole wheat balances the flavor nicely.

Did I mention this was an art form?

Slather mayo on both pieces of bread.

You MUST use Hellmann's.
If you dont' have any, just stop.  Put some butter on the bread, forget the tomato and have yourself some toast.

No other mayonnaise is to be accepted.

If you are a Miracle Whip fan leave now and never return.

Apply salt and pepper to the mayo slathered bread.

Slice the toms 1/4 inch thick or so.  Not too thin.

Myself, I use two toms.  But, I am a professional.
Beginners should stick with just one.

As you eat your delicious sandwich, fear not the tomato-mayo-combo juices that inevitably run down your arm.  This is a sign of a job well done.

You won't be able to answer the phone, turn the pages of your book, surf the internet, or open the door for anyone who may ring the bell.  Just sit and enjoy the fruit that heavenly nature has provided for you.

A tomato-red soiled napkin such as this equals culinary success!